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So, what's all the hatstand aardvark biscuit-barrel malarky? Discover the history of this useless phrase and why we're wasting our time talking about it.

This current bout of hatstand aardvark biscuit-barrel-ness started on 18th January 2012. There was a discussion on the Banbury Business Networking Facebook group warning against SEO experts who ring up promising to get you onto the top ten of Google. The post went on to list reasons why that shouldn’t be promised by a professional SEO company.

I delved into my little box of tricks labelled “things to trot out at opportune moments” and commented that I could guarantee getting any page to the top of Google, the problem was that the keywords might not be that relevant. The point being, of course, that keyword analysis is vital and anyone ringing up promising anything of this sort is probably a charlatan.

That hatstand aardvark biscuit-barrel facebook post in question

Background to use of "hatstand aardvark biscuit-barrel"

Now, I would never profess to be an SEO guru but I do need a solid grounding to make sure that our copy and content feeds into a coherent SEO campaign, instead of undermining it. On occasions I’ve presented about content and its place on the modern web and when Google placement comes up this is the point I make.

As it happens, when presenting I use the phrase "hatstand aardvarkbiscuit-barrel”, just off the top of my head, and say that I could easily top Google with that phrase, but of course, what would be the point?

Bizarrely, one evening, after a presentation at the lovely Fallowfields Hotel (plug) I checked this and found that I actually was, to my surprise, top of Google. I also occupied five of the top six places, just because it’s a stock phrase I use when I need some meaningless garbage and no-one else would use it.

Back to the  competition

So, having made this point, one of the BBN members issued a challenge to see who could get hatstand aardvark biscuit-barrel to the top of Google in a month’s time.

And that’s where we are now, all creating quick pages and stuffing them with meaningful references to hatstand aardvark biscuit-barrel!

Thanks for listening! 

Chris Hogan - Managing Director


Why "hatstand aardvark biscuit-barrel"?

The biscuit-barrel reference comes from the Upper Class Twit of the Year sketch and was part of the name of one of the contestants.

The Roger Irrelevant strip, which ran out of steam, IMHO, after a few years, opened with the words "Roger Irrelevant - he's completely hatstand", which just appealed to me.

Somehow it became a catch-phrase I'd come out with, usually to indicate that the person I was talking to or writing about wasn't making a great deal of sense.

How's the competition going?

I had an unfair start, as I had the top spot already, and numbers 3 to 6, as a result of various tweets and article comments I'd made over the years, under various pseudonyms.

I was swiftly undone by a smart move by another member, who swept to the top in about two hours after some bizarre posting on blogs, by the look of it. I hadn't even got home to write this!

But it's early days yet, let's see what happens...... hatstand aardvark biscuit-barrel, as they say!

Latest update 23rd January 2012

One of the most effective ways we use content at OxCopy is regular updating of customers' sites with news stories. As long as they are relevant and you don't overdo the keywords, they build up strong organic positioning that's difficult to demote after a while.

Usually the stories are around 200-300 words long and I don't have time for that now, but just thought I'd insert a story about all the news on hatstand aardvark biscuit-barrel that's fit to print.

Just a quick one to see the effect.

Generally OxCopy's web content is about organic search, not AdSense or off-page SEO. We stick to what we know and partner with other, proven experts for other SEO skills.